Everyday.

This is before.



and this is after.

They both have a message that is wonderful and that we should all have. I really don't have much to say, But I wanted to show you those. I made them with my close friend Claire and I put them here so I know I'll never lose them.

Thank You for listening,
and thank you for staying with me,
Dear God,
You've helped me through the tough times
I'm sorry I never noticed you.

Sincerely
Kyleigh Jewel Sanchez.

Believe me, it hurts.

I've done bad things before. Things that I regret and things I wish I could take back. People have called me ugly and disgusting and stupid. I believe them. When the tears fall at night that's when I believe them. I believe the words I read, the words I hear. Having no one telling me they're wrong just makes me accept it.


I am a slut.
I am ugly.
I am worthless.
I am idiotic.
I am never going to be loved.
I am never going to be cared for.
I am never going to find my one.
I am never going to be his one.
I am nothing.

Nothing in a world of everything. When I look at what people say about me, I don't think they realize what I go through everyday. Everyday knowing that what they say is true. That what they say will always hurt me.

I've never been truly loved. Love is a lie. Lieing will always hurt. Hurt will always kill me. When I'm finally torn apart, will people miss me when I'm gone? When I lay in the coffin cold as ice.

Will you be the people that say "She deserved it."
Or will you be the one that says, "I wish she hadn't gone."

Will you regret what you've said, or will you laugh at me even harder?

Lonelieness doesn't assure life without hurt.
But it assures life without as much hurt.

When you interact with people everyday some of them are going to make fun of me, some of them will give you the horrible looks that make you cringe and want to curl up and walk away.

Well..
I've been hurt way to much. So I'm just taking myself away from what is causing it.
I must leave now.

I love nothing
I love nobody
I will never love anyone.
Because loving someone, gives them more of a change to hurt me. I won't be able to live through that.

Bye.
Kyleigh Jewel Sanchez.

1...2..3..4.. What comes next?

The title really doesn't have a point I know, but it was something to call this. I'm having trouble breathing right now, god damn it I hate this weather :( I'm looking forward to tomorrow though! Sadly I can't tell you why because I don't want anyone to know ;)

~Darling what is going on honestly that never happened lying is your favorite passion~

Oh Escape the fate how I do love you. Speaking of music, I've been listening to this song by Goodnight nurse called My Only. I'm addicted to it now, but when I go to search it up on youtube it comes up as "the only exception" so I kinda get annoyed about that. Sorry if i'm not my "deep" self today. Or at this moment. I'm just really happy. Some days we really do just have days when we are happy for no apparent reason.

I just wanna turn on the radio and dance and sing!

I'm sorry that I really don't have much to say, making this my shortest blog post yet!!

Bye :(
-Ky

Dee... Doo... Sing my own song.

Sing along
To my song
Come and play
We will stay
forever friends
till the end
Dum dee dooo
Dee doo dummm
Dumm daaa doo
La La La La la.

I'm in a mood were nothing mattes. Where the world could end and I'd be humming something no one would expect me to be humming. la.. La la la... La.. La la laaa... La la... laaa..

To much has happened for me to really explain it all. My boyfriend dumped me for good this time and now he's gay, I went to my best friend to talk to and she flipped out on me thinking about how my ex would feel instead of me, I lost all hope in her and now me and her aren't even really friends. I think this guy is going to ask me out and I hope he does, but if he does I'll be scared to say Yes because of what his best friend had did to me. Remember Aidan? Well he's just being plain confusing, He loves me, He hates me, He needs me, He doesn't care for me. I think I'd be better without him. Easier on me

Also Remember Ryan? Well hes talking to me again. I feel like hes trying to direct my life, Like I'm just following his path and not the path I want to follow. I'll break that off sooner or later. I can't have people telling me what I am supposed to do. He's a year older than me, not 10 yrs older. I can tell whats right and wrong. I'm a big girl now! ;)

I lost friends, but I still have some I guess. I stayed close with some people from Winchester, But I never really talk to them except for my main people that IM/Txt me a lot, or email me. Emails are fun to do though, I've never had a friend who I just email instead of talking to them over the phone or something.

I have a lot to say, but to say I have not a reason to say it because it would be giving you to much information and do I need the world knowing every little detail about me? If anyone is still reading, let me know! Its a little creepy when I write a post, it makes me feel like I'm just talking to myself even though I do that a lot. Wrapping this up, thanks for listening, and sorry I haven't said anything in a while. I may not be a famous blogger, but that doesn't mean I'm nothing. I'm a something in a crowd of better something.

Peace Out Girl Scouts and Live life for you because thats what we all deserve!

Te Amo- Rhianna.